Owls from Last Night

[coreofaphoenix]

it's like texts from last night only better and with wizards/witches!

you know it goes

Comments

[baby_deer]

What makes you think I'd curse a dildo?

Unless I could leave it on Snape's grave

Fuck I'd totally curse a dildo I need to stop drinking now

[reparo]

Harry, language!
Also - Harry, pettiness!

This is definitely why I won't tell you. This and you'd tell George and then we'd have a full range of cursed dildoes.

[baby_deer]

WTF HERMIONE YOU TURNED A WOMAN INTO A BEETLE BECAUSE SHE SAID MEAN THINGS ABOUT YOU

I mean I love you but you're the pettiest person I know

Is pettiest a word?

Anyway I' sure George already knows

[reparo]

SHE DESERVED IT

[baby_deer]

SO DOES SNAPE

[reparo]

You play dirty, Potter.

[baby_deer]

So how do you curse a dildo?

[reparo]

There are spells that activate when a specific keyword is spoken, and you can modify them to specific letters.

[baby_deer]

I shouldn't have started drinking before you answered that question

[reparo]

Personally I think triggering them to the letter S is the most efficient option.

[baby_deer]

Because evil people scream 'watch me i'm a snake!' when they're about to orgasm?

1/3

[reparo]

You're the worst.

[reparo]

And the best.

[reparo]

Most people say "that's so good."

[baby_deer]

The fact that this is why my mind went kinda explains why I don't get laid

[reparo]

Yes, Harry, it's the "watch me i'm a snake".

[baby_deer]

They don't call me Parselmouth for nothing

[reparo]

OH MY GOD, UNREAD
UNREAD

[baby_deer]

Stop clutching your pearls

There is no way you got what I was talking about, because even I don't know, I was just saying shit

This is good vodka. Why didn't we drink vodka in Hogwarts?

[reparo]

Probably to spare people from you ever making that terrible Parselmouth joke, Harry.

[baby_deer]

I'M A SNEIK! I'M A SNEIK!

[reparo]

Ridiculous.

[baby_deer]

Hermione!

It's pronounce ri-DIK-ku-lus, not RI-di-cu-lous. You'll never kill a boggart with this attitude.

[reparo]

You are a re-DICK-ulous.

[baby_deer]

I can't believe you don't want to discuss enunciating. Maybe it's YOU who doesn't know how to curse a dildo