hogwartsexpressed | Nightmares & Revelations (CLOSED

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Nightmares & Revelations (CLOSED - for Hermione & Draco)

A lot had changed since the end of the war. Harry hadn't gone back to Ginny as so many had assumed and they were both okay with that. More than okay, if he was honest. The only one who hadn't taken it so well... okay, the only two people who hadn't taken it so well were Molly and Ron. To them, they were supposed to be this giant happy Weasley family and well, Hermione and he had other aspirations.

After those months in the tent, after Ron had left them, Hermione and he had discussed their hopes, their dreams, their fears and even shared each other's beds. After the war, they hadn't let themselves or each other simply settle for the Ministry or to just get married and start having a family. They wanted and needed something bigger, where they could do more to the benefit of their society.

He had of course told Ron that nothing happened and to this day, he wasn't sure why he had insisted that nothing happened - maybe to make everyone else happy? But after it was all said and done, he knew how pointless that had been. Not only had their society changed but they had changed.

Hogwarts would always be his first home but neither of them felt ready to return to the scene of the war. Perhaps that was putting it nicely. They were done with the manipulations from Dumbledore and knew Hogwarts would only bring up bad thoughts and memories for the both of them. Instead, they had been approached by the International Confederation of Wizards to join their next recruiting class. It would be hard work, they were told, but they were used to that. After Hermione found her parents and returned their memories, they accepted the position and headed to Rome, much to Ron's disappointment and dismay.

They'd went in on a three bedroom flat of a wizarding world apartment complex, it wasn't as if Harry was hurting for money after the will reading of Sirius and his parents (whose had been buried intentionally by Dumbledore) and taking up his lordship. They had assumed they would use the other room for an office but when they met their fellow recruits, they realized there was likely another reason for it. They hadn't been the only ones from Britain to be approached by the ICW, imagine their surprise when Draco Malfoy had shown up that first day. Not only that, but in their training exercises, the three of them had been paired up a number of times and surprisingly (and unsurprisingly) enough... they worked really well together. It didn't take Hermione and him long to approach Draco about moving into the third bedroom.

The more surprising part was that he'd accepted.

It had been just over five months since Draco had moved in with them and he could honestly say they were starting to make headway.

It was just Harry's luck that the night Hermione was out of town working on assignment was the night he had his first nightmare since before they came to Rome. It was as it always was - Sirius' death, Voldemort's annoying monstrous face and Dumbledore's ever present manipulations - losing everything he loved and cared for. What he didn't know was that he was screaming, tossing and turning in his bed and his magic getting a little bit (a lot) out of control. Normally, Hermione was home and would be alerted the moment his magic got loose or that he was having a nightmare. But tonight, he was on his own. Or he might've been had the silencing spells on his room not broken on the onslaught of his magic, alerting Draco to the situation at hand.

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Going from being on the run, to being able to settle back into their home had been mindblowing for Draco. He had gratefully, and without many questions, accepted the appointment from the ICW. He'd only had one question.

Would they pardon and forgive Narcissa.

When they had, he had said good bye to her after warding their ancestral home against his father in case he was freed, and went to training.

Now he's here. Living in a home with Harry Potter and Hermione Granger, and he's respected. By his coworkers. By the ministry. Sure some look at him sideways, waiting for him to turn, but he knows he won't ever turn back to the Death Eaters that remain, and is rather proud to have been deemed a traitor by those that had stood by his father.

He nods though when Harry talks about how hard it can be. "I can understand that. I dream a lot that I'm back on the Tower, or still running with my mother. Just know you're not in this alone. Kind of twice over now."

No matter what happens, he's there for Harry. For them both.

Moving to the window, he lets the owl out and closes the window behind it. He's still not always certain about those that might come for him, that they still haven't found.

Harry lifted his gaze to meet Draco's, thankful for that. He knew Hermione understood obviously - she'd been there the entire time. But to hear that Draco also understood from his own mouth... he exhaled again and nodded. "I know there are a lot of people out there still recovering and grieving but... it also feels like so many went back to normal. Went back to their old lives as though nothing had happened. They're back to their petty grudges..." It was as though the war meant nothing to some of them. But... he supposed he also fought for people to return to their normal lives.

He watched the owl fly away and smiled a little at just the thought of Hermione sending him an owl in the middle of the night. He hated that she'd felt it though, he hated disrupting anyone's sleep. It was one thing his sleep was shit, no one else's should be.

"I need to research better and stronger wards for my room," he said, shaking his head. "They haven't been broken quite like that in a while."

"Even those that were involved in it in many ways. Those that might not have worn the mask of a death eater, but you and I both know their families were involved. The only ones that didn't return to their lives either fought at that school or were are now in prison."

He holds so much disdain for those that pretended it never happened and did nothing to fight Voldemort and just went back to his life. He'd had no choice in it but, in the end, he'd been made to be part of it. He couldn't just go back to his life. Even if he had wanted to, he couldn't.

"So you can suffer them alone? Is that the plan?"

"Exactly," Harry said, looking at him. He felt... almost guilty that he was upset that so many people could pretend that the war never happened. He knew that was the PTSD talking and his own way to grieve. It will never truly ever go away. He'd likely always be somewhat... too paranoid and ward any home he had to the inch of its capacity. But, he was told, it would eventually bother him less. "Fuck, I know that logically... that the result of the war was so that people like them could live normally. But it also pisses me off that they can pretend that nothing happened..." He didn't admit that to just anyone.

He tilted his head. "Just because my sleep is absolute shit doesn't mean anyone else's should be," he said, looking down at the coffee cup he held between his hands. "Waking up with Harry Potter's wild magic isn't what you signed on for..."

It's the one advantage of them being in a home together. They all suffer in varying ways from the trauma of the war. They know that and share it. They don't look at one another and expect them to just be over it. So many wanted to leave it in the past, and the three of them know it won't ever absolutely be over. Not for them. For things like this. Like the nightmares.

"I didn't sign up for being a child soldier in a war either, but that doesn't change I was. If you couldn't control them, and it was every night? I would still be here, Potter. Absolutely."

"Yeah... well, unlike that, this is optional. You don't have to live here if you don't want to," he said. He didn't want Draco to not feel safe or... want to be here. Harry blinked at the last part of his statement. "Truly?"

Other than Hermione, he didn't know anyone who would truly stick around something like that.

He was a bit surprised, honestly. But... also pleased to know that either way, Draco would stick around.

"No, it's not optional," Draco argues. "You are my friend, Potter, and I'm no abandoning you to deal with those yourself. How could I move out of here and pretend like I didn't know that was going on here?"

And that for him is a huge part of it. He couldn't know what he does now and just walk away. It wouldn't help either of them.

"I mean it. I'm here to be there with you, to help if I can."

Harry opened his mouth then closed it... a few times. Of course he considered Draco a friend (and potentially something more) but he hadn't truly let himself believe that it went the other way as well. He'd hoped, of course, but to hear Draco said that shocked him and admittedly a bit speechless.

After a minute he cleared his throat. "Thank you," he said. "That - really means a lot."

"Wow, so shocked,' he taunts with a smirk, shifting to move in closer, standing toe to toe with Harry. "Listen to me, Potter. We were enemies because of others, not ourselves. We were pawns, and now we know that. We can see the world clearly, and it means fixing the past and forging on, okay?"

Because for him, that is their past and this is their life.

It wasn't every day that Harry was shocked speechless - especially in recent years. So the fact that Draco made him speechless, without the use of a spell, was a feat to be sure. He narrowed his gaze at the taunting smirk but allowed himself a wry chuckle, watching as the man stood toe to toe with him. "There were times when I do wonder what would have happened had I taken your hand that day," he admitted, watching the blonde. "And despite it taking 7-8 years, I'm glad that we can be that." And more, obviously.

He snaked an arm out and brought the other man closer. He didn't want to go too far, not without Hermione being home. But... he wanted to feel the other man close to him. "I think we forgot the scones...," he murmured with a little smile.

"You would have ended up a pawn of the Dark Lord," he says, not doubting that in the least. "My father would have treated you like a second son, and then just handed you to him on a silver platter," he says, shoulders tightening then, his chin lifting. "You know, just like he did me."

And he believes that after what his father did to him, let them do to him, they would both be dead now.

Stepping in, sliding his hand over Harry's chest as he stares into his eyes. "And you think this is going to make me move and get them?" Smiling though as he rests his brow against Harry's. "I'm glad you didn't shake my hand then. I really am."

Harry tilted his head and considered his words before nodding in agreement. "You're right about that," he said. "He would have done the same to me as he did to you. Your father really needs to be brought down," he muttered before exhaling a breath. He'd rather have this all these years later, after the war, then either or both of them dead.

"No," he admitted with a smile and lifted a hand, using his wandless and silent spell casting to take the scones out of the oven and turning it off. "Now we don't have to worry about the flat burning down," he teased him, bringing the other man in closer. Harry rested his forehead against Draco's and exhaled a soft breath. "I'm glad that I didn't either... but I'm even more glad we have this now."

He liked the way Draco felt right there in his arms and the way the other man's hand rest on his chest.

"He would have," Draco says, though Harry's words take him back, making him pause a moment. It's not that he agrees with him but that no one has worried about it. They dismiss him as a dilettante, and Draco thinks that's intentional, something he's done to ensure that no one looks at Lucius too closely. "I can't argue with you, but he's not the only one either."

It is so odd, in the best possible ways. He's not worrying, and he doesn't feel he has to watch his back all the time. Not in this flat. Not with them.

Sliding his hands along Harry's waist, just resting there and enjoying the intimacy. It's something that he's never had, not really with anyone, so this feels better than it should.

"I'm glad for that as well. Even if I know I can't kiss you like I want. Not and face Hermione's wraith. Sorry, not doing that.

Harry had spent most of his life worrying about the things that no one else thinks about - Dark Lords that he knew for a fact weren't really gone and had, came to mind. So, he knew that Lucius Malfoy was still a problem and knew there were others out there who could become a problem later on. "No, he's not. But by the time we're done with training, we'll have everything at our disposal to take care of them."

Because you can bet that Harry would do what he could to make sure those who were left didn't become a problem.

Harry smiled, enjoying this little bit of intimacy with Draco. It felt really nice. He chuckled at the mention of Hermione and her wrath. "Smart," he said with a smile, watching him fondly. "Least she'll be back today," he said with a soft exhale, sliding a hand up and down Draco's back.

He likes how Harry says that. We will have all we need. He loves hearing that from him, and is glad for that assurance that they would manage to take care of things. He's worried about it for himself alone, but he's realizing more and more that he's not in anything alone. Not anymore.

"We'll take care of them. All of them," he says, knowing he isn't the only one that wants to make that their first priority after all they've been through.

"And just what do you think we'll be doing then? Hmmm?"

There was absolutely no doubt in Harry's mind that they would have everything they need to tackle any problem that came ahead. As far as Harry saw it, the three of them (romantically or not) were a team. And honestly, a far stronger one than perhaps when Ron had been that third. If Draco wasn't going to let Harry suffer his nightmares by himself then Harry would be damned if he let Draco go through any of this by himself.

"Every single one of them," he agreed with a little smile. It was absolutely the first priority on Harry's mind. Once he explained it to Hermione (though he didn't think he would have to, she was likely thinking about the same), she would likely agree.

"Well first... we'll likely have breakfast and we'll assure her that I'm fine after the nightmare and am really glad she's home. After that... we'll have to play it by ear," he said with a cheeky sort of smile. "Unless, of course, you had other plans for your Saturday morning?"

Despite being glad that he escaped it all, he does like the hunting down of the old members of the Death Eaters and bringing them in or ending them. Whichever way it needs to go. He's okay with it either way.

Smiling at that promise, wrapping an arm around Harry's shoulders, pulling him in close and hugging him. Glad to be able to hold him, not sure he has a way to tell him how he feels about him saying that, agreeing with it, willing to help him with it.

"So I don't kiss her when she walks in? Or strut around naked? Okay, got it," he says in a soft voice, trying to be funny as he's still trying not to snuffle about it because it's all so hard and would be horrible if he was doing this alone.

Harry smiled as Draco hugged him tighter. He liked the feeling of the other man in his arms like this. He was glad (really glad, honestly) that Draco was as into them as they were into him.

"I mean, you could kiss her when she walks in. She may enjoy that," Harry mused with a soft chuckle. "The naked part may throw her off a little." He knew what the other man was trying to do but Harry wasn't going to call him out on his. Just hold him like he was.

"I have no doubt that it will be interesting around here going forward," he murmured with a soft smile. "How about we take this coffee and head to the living room?" Though he still made no effort to move, just holding onto him. Because honestly, Harry probably needed it just as much as Draco did.

There had always been a crush, especially on Harry. The boy who lived with his beautiful eyes and infuriating demeanor. Pansy had called him on it more than once. The others learned to stop mentioning. He can't help but laugh softly.

"I look amazing naked, thank you,' he says, though he pauses before adding. "Back in school, Pansy gave me shite about you and the crush I had. When I moved in here, she asked if I was pursuing that. When I mentioned Hermione lives here as well, she noted that threesomes are eautiful. I laughed at her and told her she was an idiot."

And she might be an idiot, but she hadn't been wrong about so many things apparently.

"Oh, I have no doubt about that at all," Harry assured him with a chuckle. "She has no idea about this conversation happening though."

Harry couldn't help it, a grin spread over his mouth when Draco told him about Pansy and his crush. "Hermione and Ron gave me a hard time about my crush on you as well," he admitted, though he had been absolutely sure Draco likely knew of it. He chuckled softly.

"It sounds like she approves of our living arrangements," he said, looking at the other man. It mattered to him that his friends and hopefully his mother would be okay with this, with them. First, they had to talk to Hermione when she got home. She was the most important factor of this entire thing.

"Your crush?" He asks it wide eyed, positively wicked. "So when you were stalking me it wasn't all professional, as it were?"

Though that reminds him.

"That day, on the Express," he says, ducking his head and looking away before dragging his gaze back to Harry. "I did that for your own good. I knew you were there, and realizing that you might follow us and be caught... I could have done it gentler," he admits, reaching up and tenderly stroking his cheek. "I'm sorry.

"And she does. She wants me happy. Pansy and I, we've recovered a lot from those days and worked to make our lives what we wanted, not what our parents wanted."

Harry smirked in amusement. "In the brain of a Gryffindor teenager it was definitely professional. At least, that's what I continually told them. They didn't believe a single word of it, as you can imagine."

He stayed quiet, letting Draco speak without interruption. Harry lifted a hand and cupped Draco's cheek, leaning into Draco's touch in return. "I was... upset at first but afterward, much... later, I understood. At least, I thought I understood. You've been forgiven long ago for things that happened during that time, Draco," he said, softly and looked at him. "I hope you know that."

"From what I understand, she's made herself indispensable with Dean and Seamus at their magical tattoo shop," he admitted with a chuckle. "I admit, we've been tempted to go get one of their tattoos." Harry was glad though that Draco and Pansy have made their lives into something they've wanted, what would make themselves proud to lead and not something their parents wanted. While he didn't have a parents expectation for himself, Harry knew on some level how it must feel with the wizarding world expecting things of him that he perhaps wouldn't want for himself necessarily.

"I don't think us living together now is going to do anything to make them believe back then that you weren't just madly in lust with me, Potter," he teases, smirking though as he leans into that touch.

Leaning into it, eyes closing and enjoying the sensation of Harry's touch. Even as he smiles at that, though it's a tight, sad smile. "Honestly, no. I haven't known that. You might forgive me for that one event, but the world, our world? Hasn't forgiven me and it will likely never happen for may of them. All I can do is fight what I did with what I'm doing now," he says, believing that is all he can do.

"You should. She does beautiful, magical work. She keeps trying to get me in the chair to cover up the mark," he admits, even now wearing a long sleeve sleep shirt so that it isn't shown. "She thinks she can basically reverse the magic of it but I would be her experiment so she's perfecting the magic."

"Well now I can definitely admit that there were less... professional reasons to keep watching your arse," Harry said with a smirk, watching him with a soft gaze. He desperately wanted to press a kiss to Draco's mouth but he was resisting that urge. It wouldn't be right when Hermione wasn't here.

Harry's thumb slid over the arch of Draco's cheekbone and exhaled a soft breath. "The British hold a grudge like nothing else and are perpetually stuck in the past," he said, fully aware that he was British and talking about his own people. But honestly, was it untrue? He didn't think so. "Which is why we are no longer in England and can't imagine returning for a long damn time other than to help out where requested. I've found the citizens of Rome and the ICW care less. You have made a change and we all see it."

"You should," Harry said, looking at him. "We'd go with you. Dean and Seamus have told me how far along it's coming and that it's very promising. They said she's getting really close. What would you get?"

"I'm feeling entirely entrapped this minute. Is this why you worked to get me out here in my nightclothes? Wicked man," he says with a laugh, finding such comfort in the peace between them in that moment. It's easy to have these talks, to share in this moment and not have it be about the past, even as they're talking about the past.

"I'll only go back for friends, for Pansy and to see my Mum. I have no interest in returning there. I would rather live in the states," he says, making a face. "Not that I'm rushing off for their either."

He's quiet though, considering that and what he's thought about getting. He looks away, actually blushing though it's only the slightest tinge of flush to his cheeks. "It's dumb. I mean, it's not even original. I've thought about getting a dragon," he admits.

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